When do you know?

Someone in my inner circle is going through something very similar to what I went through last year. She asked me the other day how she would know when it was time.

How do you know when enough is enough? How do you know when the time has come to make the leap into the unknown? How do you know when it's time to have blind faith that you WILL be okay, and just do it? You just know. There is a moment in time, hopefully not to painful a moment, when you say to yourself, "What I am going through right now is worse than my fear of leaving." At that point, it's time to go. When the disdain for the situation outweighs the fear of what is going to happen, then you know.

That moment happened for me in a very dramatic way, which I will not go into detail about here. It was scary, but no one was physically injured. It was a moment in which I thought to myself, "This is your life, and this is crazy. This is the most drama you have ever endured, and THIS is too much." I want a peaceful, happy, fun life. Not one filled with fear, angst, sadness...who wants that?!?!

That was my moment. I knew it. I was scared to the point of shaking, but I made the move I needed to. It took help from the proper channels, which I pursued. Never in my life have I made a more daring move, never have I been more scared. Never have I questioned what my life had become, more than that night. Everything from then on, well, it was and is hard, but it is easier than that night.

How do you know when anything is right? How do you know when you have found the right person? Chosen the right major? Chosen the right job? Faith. When your faith is shaken, it can be tough to regain. I have issues with faith on a daily basis. I constantly question whether I even deserve to be happy. I question my value as a person, whether I am worthy of the treatment I long for by someone who is my partner for life. I question these things, but in the end, I have faith that the answer is yes, I do deserve it. Yes, I will have it. Yes, I will be able to give it in return. Yes, happiness exists, and I have it.

When do you know? When your heart tells you so.